Brandy and self-pity

T'Pren's brows lifted at that and while there was a momentary sting from the comment, she cocked a lopsided smile at Darren. "Do you think I go around kissing just anyone? I have a very long list of qualifications, I'll have you know. Half-Vulcan kisses are a rare and precious commodity."

"No, I think they're a gift," he said. "I want to try and sleep off the worst of this, Pren. I'm glad you stopped by."

Rai referring to her kisses as a gift rekindled Pren's urge to kiss him, which made the wound throb a little more for just a moment. But mostly it made her smile.

"Don't drink anymore tonight," T'Pren insisted gently but firmly. "No more getting drunk alone. I know you need it right now to take the edge off of the weight you're carrying, but no more than you absolutely can't be without, okay?"

"No, I'm done for the night," he said. "Thank you for the divine intervention," he said, still slightly tipsy.

T'Pren's cheeks flushed a dark mint and her heart thumped against her ribs painfully, her desire to put her lips to Rai's now salt in that open wound.

When ignoring the ache wasn't helping it go away, she shrank slightly, preparing herself for rejection. Speaking through the lump in her throat ever so quietly, she murmured, "Darren?"

"Yes?" he asked. He could feel the dull ache before she spoke.

The green darkened and flooded T'Pren's pale skin from neck to pointed ears. She shut her eyes and shook her head slowly against the urge to ask. "Nevermind," she whispered. When she opened her eyes again, she didn't make eye contact, but instead watched her feet as she started to climb back up to standing.

"Fair enough. I guess this is goodnight then," he said.

It was a complicated thing, figuring out what needed to stay left unsaid and what wasn't being said and what should have been said and what needed to be said when one of the people in the conversation was an empath. T'Pren couldn't help the slightly hurt look she gave Rai when she was finally standing, although this hurt was mostly about the fact that he clearly knew and wasn't saying anything either way.

The half-Vulcan struggled visibly and emotionally, standing awkwardly as she was between the blanket and the door with that open wound crying out for attention and her cheeks hot green.

She didn't say goodnight because she hadn't quite made her legs point to the door yet. She shoved her hands over her face and back into her hair in deep frustration at her own inner conflict.

Rai peered up at her with wide, bloodshot eyes, before disarming the moment by shoving seven grapes into his mouth at once.

"I know I should take your silence as a no," T'Pren whispered thickly, her hands back over her eyes to stop any potentially humiliating tears.

"We've both agreed to stay friends, Pren," he said, trying not to choke as he swallowed three barely chewed grapes. "We need to stick to it."

"Then," Pren replied miserably, her tears obvious in her voice even as she hid them with her hands, "as your friend...can I at least have a hug?"

He rose to his feet and embraced her quickly. "Pren," he said. "I'm really sorry it had to be this way."

The slender half-Vulcan wrapped her arms tightly around Rai, lonely and grateful for the contact. She pressed her cheek to his shoulder, facing away from his neck so that she wouldn't be tempted to kiss him. He could no doubt feel the quick, heavy thumps of her heart against his stomach.

"How do Betazoids do it?" she asked quietly, needfully. "How do you feel that kind of...closeness...that kind of not being alone...and not...get attached?"

"If you enter a pairing with the intention to complete yourself, you'll get attached, and you will surely get hurt. I'm already complete," he said. "I've learned it's alright to be alone."

"I didn't have any intentions," T'Pren replied quietly, swallowing down the lump in her throat. After a moment, though, she admitted in a thick whisper, "But I'm so tired of being alone."

"I know you are, Pren. You're never really alone, though. I'm always going to be your friend," he said.

The half-Vulcan held onto the Betazoid for a long, silent moment, contemplating what he'd said and what she was feeling and trying to coax away the tightness in her throat. "I'm sorry," she sighed eventually, turning her head and stretching up to kiss him meaningfully on the cheek.

He shut his eyes gratefully at the contact of her lips. "Goodnight, Pren."

As she pulled away from the embrace, T'Pren slid her hand down Rai's arm to squeeze his hand one last time. She gave him a sad, vulnerable, but strong hint of a smile. "Good night, Darren. I'll see you in the morning." The smile grew just a little. "I'll try not to kill us all."

"Yes, make an effort with that," he said, chuckling sadly.

T'Pren grinned broadly at that, the hurt momentarily forgotten. "Get some sleep." And then she stepped out into the corridor.

Rai watched her leave, and dropped into his bed heavily, to catch a few hours of sleep before he was on duty again.